Friday, November 01, 2013

Even the Leaves Sing of His Goodness

It's a chilly Autumn morning. The leaves have transformed into wondrous hues of orange, gold, and deep red. The sun is shining, birds are chirping, and I am contently sitting on my couch under a cozy blanket with a piping hot cup of coffee beside me. These are the moments when I have to pause and thank God. It's easy to run to Him when life isn't going well, but sometimes it takes effort to stop in the midst of wonderful moments and truly praise Him for His goodness to us.

And that is a good segue into a story that I'd like to share about God's goodness seen this week.

It all began Sunday night. I was lying in bed and could not fall asleep due to an overly stuffy nose that was just waiting to blossom into a full on cold. As my head felt more and more stuffed up, I decided that it was hopeless to try to fall asleep right then. When I am sick I tend to think more. Maybe it's because I'm too tired to do anything else, but somehow my brain can run amuck with thoughts. It slowly began to churn and I started thinking about my life.

I've graduated from college. I live with my sister. I'm single. And I don't have a full time job. I felt apathetic.

I am very content, don't get me wrong! I enjoy subbing at different schools and I love working at the SchoolBox. I'm thankful for the jobs that I have and I really do love them. But then my mind started the comparing game. Damarise is starting into the Police academy soon. No longer will we both be working part time jobs at random hours throughout the day. Rather she will have a full job, and I will be the one who seems too incompetent to handle a "real" job.

The thoughts went from a thankfulness of where God has me in life, to a sudden fear of "what if this isn't what I should be doing?" "what if I'm too lazy to go out and find a real job?". These what-ifs plagued my sleep that night.

I woke up the next morning to an email from a professor at Covenant who sends me multiple emails from different schools that are hiring and always asking me if I'm interested. That morning's email was from a school in Morocco. I thought maybe it was a sign. Maybe the feeling that I should stay in Chattanooga was all wrong and in reality I should be in Morocco, though I felt no desire to go.

That night I went shopping with Janessa. She is a fount of wisdom and I am so thankful to God for her friendship throughout all of college and beyond. I relayed to her my thoughts throughout the day and told her that I don't want to be apathetic! I want to go out and live life for Christ. I told her I tried to find a teaching job during the Summer months, but no one was hiring. Maybe I hadn't been forceful enough, maybe I am lazy. She stopped me and asked me if I was content. Of course I am! I absolutely love doing what I'm doing now. But I wondered if it was enough. If I was good enough. She told me that God's given me the desire and love for subbing and working at the SchoolBox and that is great. God has gifted people with different abilities and given them different avenues to pursue their talents in and right now I'm where God has me and in the job He's given me and He is using me in those venues. I needed that reminder.

That night ended with me thanking God for where He has me. Yet, some desire had opened up for the first time in a long while – a desire to be back in the classroom and teach kids. Not just subbing, but for a while. I know I majored in Elementary Education, but I'd be lying if I said that as soon as I graduated I just wanted to jump right into a classroom. Oh no, in fact I questioned my choice of major. Then I began subbing and found that I really enjoyed it. I also started co-teaching a sunday school class and loved every minute of it. And Monday night I realized that I had a strong desire to be in the classroom again.

If a principal had called me a week before and offered me a position to teach, I probably would have fumbled around with my words and slowly figured out an excuse, so that I wouldn't have to commit but could continue to sub. Yet, something happened Monday night and suddenly I found myself wishing that something would open up. I scoured the web in search of a position in Chattanooga. I looked at daycares, schools, even after school care. But nothing was open.

Tuesday came and I was struck with a fever as that nasty cold slowly overtook my whole being. As I was lying in bed slowly wasting my life away watching Netflix, my phone rang. It was a Tennessee number, so I answered it. My voice was hoarse and my ears were so stuffed I could barely hear. But I heard enough. A principal was calling me to ask if I would come in for an interview for a long term sub position in Kindergarten. I said yes!

Fast forward to Friday where I had the interview and got the position. In four days I went from feeling apathetic, to wanting to teach, to now having a position offered me where I can teach for a month! I am feeling overwhelmed with joy. To the One who knows all things, who gives good gifts to His children, who gives beyond all we can ever ask or imagine, to Him belongs all praise! I'm going to be a Kindergarten teacher for a month and I am ecstatic. I cannot wait! God is so good!

It was a long drive back from the interview yesterday with endless stretches of road in front of me, mountains rising up victoriously on all sides, and the Autumn leaves burning bright against the stormy sky. The scenery made me turn the music down and thank God for His intricate colouring of all creation. The same leaves colour today's view and remind me to pause and thank God. His blessings surround us every day, and just as God colours the leaves to sing of His goodness, God colours our lives with His goodness, it is a vibrant painting declaring the faithfulness of our Saviour. 

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